WElcoMe To the REAL ALanIs CouNTY wEBsiTe! WE'Re sO glad To sEe You'Ve fiNAlly ArrivEd!
AlanIS COunty is a smaLl town locaTEd in HuDson, NEW JErsey. Not Much Is speciAL aboUt our tOWn, exCept fOr ouR beaUTifUl GreEnery, frIEndlY folK, and cOZy hoMes anD HotelS.
Don't WorRy about comiNG here sIck! MoSt of AlAnis CouNty'S resiDents Are woRse.
CriMe here is veRY lImiTINg.
EverYone Is too AfraId tO waLk the StreEts.
AlaNIs County'S hisTOry is recoMMeNded as vERy extrAterrestRiAl. BaCk iN 1776, when JersEY was first disCovered, a sMall puDDle with An unDEsignated depTh waS found HIdden in A nEArby foreSt. THe minaturE lakE IS stilL archIVed withIn a NeArby sTRucture AnD is labEleD As H̶O̴M̶E̴!̶!
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In ThE eaRly 2000's, A tesT was ReCorded oN the BOttoMless pIt to See hOw deEP it Was. DeSPite tHe devIce Being as lARge as A buS, tHe hole'S bottOm waS nevER reaChEd. A sEcond TEst was ruN, thIs timE WIth a caMera atTacheD to tHe enD of THe dEvIce. None oF tHE PHotos or vidEos from THe teSt coUld be RETrieVed, bUt A HUmaN worKer oN The expeRImenT, nameD Max Wilson, cLAims That thE pHOtos revEalEd a LArge unmeaSUred spaCe filLEd wiTh water benEAth thE earTH. A fEw more PHotos aNd a vIdEo laTer, A mysterIOUs bEing aTtaCked tHe deviCE, kNocking OFf The caMEra.
The LEni LennaPe, an IndiAN trIbe bY the HUdSon riVer, HAve A writTEn leGend foR This DEep hoLe, kNOwn aS "Ķ̸̨̱̯͍̱̜͇̬͔̜̃͐̀͌̂̐̄͂̓͊̈̊͠Ǐ̵̢̢̥̭̫̩̭̤̱̟̥̪̮͔̫͂̅̿͗̀͛͐̿̄̈͌̾͋Ñ̸̢̧̫͉̟͖̺̠̬͔̦͑̽̽̅͊͊̐̉̔̽̕̚G̴͚̥̠̈́̇̀́̉̑̓̅̌̋͊̀͘̚͝". WhEn transcrIBed, the leGend reaDS:
"From the stars rains the Messiah."
"It came without shape, without form, without originality."
"It tried to bond with nature and the trees, and succeeded, bringing sweetness with its fruit and quenching the ground with its roots."
"A corrupt tribes' chief saw this beauty, and had the Messiah cut down out of jealously."
"The Messiah was sad. So sad, its tears burned it through the ground into the under-ocean."
"From then, the Messiah made a plan. Within centuries, the being shall make perfect mimic of every being, each bringing peace to the land."
"Once every copy has replaced its host, all will be fixed."
QUite WeLcomiNg, ISn't iT?
YeS, as iT sHOuld bE.
Speak to the one who
speaks in stolen tongues